tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post3832480529029609627..comments2024-03-29T13:53:58.551+08:00Comments on Classical Chinese Poems in English: 柳宗元 Liu Zongyuan: 江雪 River-SnowAndrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發http://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-41466127953537086732022-04-08T21:25:39.414+08:002022-04-08T21:25:39.414+08:00River and Snow
Zongyuan Liu in the mid-Tang Dynast...<b>River and Snow</b><br />Zongyuan Liu in the mid-Tang Dynasty<br /><br />Over a thou massifs no bird is in flight,<br />Onto a myriad tracks no trail is in sight.<br />A gaffer perchin’ on an alone tiny craft<br />In reed-knitted cloak n cane-woven hat,<br />Is angling but in the snow-capped river<br />Under the teeth-chatterin’ chilly winter.Daavid Woonghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08663125173179483427noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-11359587925162000342019-09-28T17:54:17.005+08:002019-09-28T17:54:17.005+08:00I thank Jonathan Babcock's fine contribution. ...I thank Jonathan Babcock's fine contribution. May I suggest for his kind consideration:<br />(a) shortening line 3 by deleting the word "old", and<br />(b) re-writing "the river's snowy sting" in line 4 as "in the river-snow's sting" to turn the line into a tetrameter.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-38062621933153921502019-09-24T04:11:01.869+08:002019-09-24T04:11:01.869+08:00A thousand hills no bird on the wing
Ten thousand ...A thousand hills no bird on the wing<br />Ten thousand paths no footprints cling<br />A straw-cloaked old man in a solitary boat<br />Fishing alone the river's snowy sting<br /><br />jonathanjaymusic@protonmail.comJonathan Babcock 白 宗杰noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-24090809451747836712010-12-05T22:58:59.534+08:002010-12-05T22:58:59.534+08:00hi, andrew,
of course, right you are!
now, thank...hi, andrew,<br /><br />of course, right you are!<br /><br />now, thanks to you, my (11-syllable per line) revised rendition will now read as follows: <br /><br />柳宗元: 江雪<br />千山鳥飛絕<br />萬徑人蹤滅<br />孤舟簑笠翁<br />獨釣寒江雪<br /><br />The River in Snow by Liu Zhongyuan (773-819)<br />O'er hills by the thousands, no bird is in flight;<br />On paths by the myriads, not a man in sight.<br />Straw-cloaked, in a lone boat, his hair all silver,<br />Lonely man rod-dips the cold, snowy river.<br /><br />thanks a million, andrew!<br /><br />frankFrank Yuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17939635563021036391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-80288286548824623642010-12-02T13:47:09.940+08:002010-12-02T13:47:09.940+08:00Dear Frank, I wonder why you insist and persist o...Dear Frank, I wonder why you insist and persist on the 10-syllable line when you can turn the entire poem into an 11-syllable one, e.g.<br />**O'er hills by the thousands, no bird is in flight,<br />**On paths by the myriads, there's no man in sight. [counting "-riads" as one syllable]<br />**Straw-cloaked, in a lone boat, his hair all silver,<br />**Alone, he rod-dips the cold, snowy river.<br />Best wishes, Andrew Wong.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-56348741853165214692010-12-01T11:39:39.776+08:002010-12-01T11:39:39.776+08:00hi, andrew,
thanks.
can i render your suggestion...hi, andrew,<br /><br />thanks.<br /><br />can i render your suggestion (for my line 3) slightly back into my 10-syllable line as follows?<br /><br />柳宗元: 江雪<br />千山鳥飛絕<br />萬徑人蹤滅<br />孤舟簑笠翁<br />獨釣寒江雪<br />The River in Snow by Liu Zhongyuan (773-819)<br />O'er a thousand hills, there's no bird in flight;<br />On ten thousand paths, not a man in sight.<br />Straw-cloaked, in lone boat, man with hair silver,<br />Alone, rod-dips the cold, snowy river.<br /><br />frankFrank Yuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17939635563021036391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-89046919759764024372010-11-28T15:56:02.477+08:002010-11-28T15:56:02.477+08:00This comment has been removed by the author.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-78609246060197577442010-11-28T15:55:58.105+08:002010-11-28T15:55:58.105+08:00On being asked by a friend how I would render 孤舟簑笠...On being asked by a friend how I would render 孤舟簑笠翁, I check this 7.2008 post only to find, to my pleasant surprise, 2 alternative renditions. Though in styles rather different from mine, they are truly beautiful. However, "Oldcastle" may wish to consider if his "so lonely that he can only sigh" takes away the subtlety of the original, and "Frank" may wish to consider whether this 11-(not his 10-)syllable line 3 sounds better "Straw-cloaked, in a lone boat, his hair all silver".<br /><br />Now back to my rendition, on re-reading mine, I have now decided to revise it by changing "a fisher-folk" into "an old folk" and "its iciness" into "icy" (and taking away some hyphens and commas), thus:-<br /><br />**"River-Snow" by Liu Zongyuan<br />1 In the thousand hills and hillocks, birds are not in flight,<br />2 On myriads of paths and pathways, no trace of men in sight;<br />3 Yet in a lone boat an old folk, in broad-hat and straw-cloak, sits<br />4 And all alone he angles, the icy river-snow despite.<br />(Andrew Wong, revised 28.11.2010)Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-39263269592639199162010-04-29T01:05:12.860+08:002010-04-29T01:05:12.860+08:00hi, andrew,
am trying my hand at pentameter trans...hi, andrew,<br /><br />am trying my hand at pentameter translation. hope you'll approve:<br /><br />The River in Snow by Liu Zhongyuan (773-819)<br />O'er a thousand hills, there's no bird in flight; <br />On ten thousand paths, not a man in sight. <br />In lone boat, straw-cloaked man with hair silver <br />Alone, rod-dips the cold, snowy river.Frank Yuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17939635563021036391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-75275850097960780032010-03-20T13:02:11.203+08:002010-03-20T13:02:11.203+08:00THis speech is very sad
hiTHis speech is very sad<br />hiOldcastlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13553233735457468220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-54588462281371708452010-03-20T13:00:21.838+08:002010-03-20T13:00:21.838+08:00mountain is high,
there's no bird in sight,
a ...mountain is high,<br />there's no bird in sight,<br />a lonely one man fishing at night,<br />so lonely that he can only sighOldcastlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13553233735457468220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-73128620686687702932010-03-20T12:57:55.486+08:002010-03-20T12:57:55.486+08:00This comment has been removed by the author.Oldcastlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13553233735457468220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-22027519746448352672010-03-20T12:57:42.862+08:002010-03-20T12:57:42.862+08:00hello i am the one doing this speech thank you for...hello i am the one doing this speech thank you for myself :)Oldcastlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13553233735457468220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-39475719617781792622010-03-20T12:55:50.720+08:002010-03-20T12:55:50.720+08:00my brother is doing a speech on this poem :)my brother is doing a speech on this poem :)Oldcastlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13553233735457468220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-6386411642202975122010-03-20T12:55:25.993+08:002010-03-20T12:55:25.993+08:00hi i learned so much from this byehi i learned so much from this byeOldcastlehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13553233735457468220noreply@blogger.com