tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post156931164278725550..comments2024-03-18T15:17:44.897+08:00Comments on Classical Chinese Poems in English: 孟浩然 Meng Haoran: 春曉 A Morning in SpringAndrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發http://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-26039959049842463622019-09-27T16:41:23.745+08:002019-09-27T16:41:23.745+08:00Dear Jonathan, Thank you for your super contribut...Dear Jonathan, Thank you for your super contribution. May I humbly suggest line 3 to read "The night's sound of wind and rain" to make all 4 lines in tetrameter. Thank you again. Andrew Wong.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-72353736494898323272019-09-24T04:02:21.582+08:002019-09-24T04:02:21.582+08:00Dawn was lost in deep spring sleep
Songbirds fill ...Dawn was lost in deep spring sleep<br />Songbirds fill my ears so sweet<br />Night sounded wind and rain<br />Countless petals fell unseen<br /><br />jonathanjaymusic@protonmail.com Jonathan Babcock 白宗杰noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-60469236102115599162018-11-28T03:41:37.408+08:002018-11-28T03:41:37.408+08:00Thank you, Andrew, for your wonderful blog. I'...Thank you, Andrew, for your wonderful blog. I'm reading a book of English translations of Tang poems at the moment, one poem each evening, and I find myself frequently reverting to your blog. Your renderings always give me another, a more authentic perspective. It's very enjoyable.IMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10001498606861397238noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-77317584496650062522016-07-16T15:29:42.964+08:002016-07-16T15:29:42.964+08:00Sorry, im not so brave thath translate this poem i...Sorry, im not so brave thath translate this poem into english since i am a hungarian men. However i translated it into my natiive language. Sincerrely: gao yanuo<br />It is my chinese name given by my chinese teatcher😅Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02304582094615573592noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-61160790461243594782016-07-16T15:28:32.666+08:002016-07-16T15:28:32.666+08:00Sorry, im not so brave thath translate this poem i...Sorry, im not so brave thath translate this poem into english since i am a hungarian men. However i translated it into my natiive language. Sincerrely: gao yanuo<br />It is my chinese name given by my chinese teatcher😅Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02304582094615573592noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-51985740814012122092016-07-16T15:22:55.335+08:002016-07-16T15:22:55.335+08:00You all shouldnt ommit the original chinese text. ...You all shouldnt ommit the original chinese text. You are dealing too much with rhytm and rhymes while not consider the original text.<br />Withot the permission of MENG the master you havent the rigt to insert or leave a word.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02304582094615573592noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-91111904632679418342015-09-01T09:14:07.434+08:002015-09-01T09:14:07.434+08:00Beautiful translation and commentary, thank you!
...Beautiful translation and commentary, thank you!<br /><br />I have also translated this poem, somewhat differently, let me know what you think!<br /><br />http://shawnpowrie.com/chinese/poem-chun-xiao-spring-dawn/Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-5301367515412232652014-11-12T23:05:07.337+08:002014-11-12T23:05:07.337+08:00anyone can state their reflections on the poem&quo...anyone can state their reflections on the poem"A morning in spring"? Thanks.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-3943188053275938062014-09-06T21:29:42.259+08:002014-09-06T21:29:42.259+08:00Oops. No 2) should read:
1) In spring, I sleep un...Oops. No 2) should read:<br /><br />1) In spring, I sleep unaware of the dawn<br />2) From everywhere are heard the calls of birds<br />3) Last night there came the sound of wind and rain<br />4) Who knows how many flowers have fallen?John Tjiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06509450370728648207noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-51541805554838926862014-09-06T21:25:43.060+08:002014-09-06T21:25:43.060+08:00Trying to put the Morning in Spring poem into the ...Trying to put the Morning in Spring poem into the same AABA scheme in English imposes an unfortunate limit on the translation, all for the sake of the rhyming, some of which feel forced. How about just a free form translation?<br /><br />1) In spring, I sleep unaware of the dawn<br />2) From everywhere came the calls of birds<br />3) Last night there came the sound of wind and rain<br />4) Who knows how many flowers have fallen?John Tjiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06509450370728648207noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-20739500969949719912014-01-02T04:14:27.551+08:002014-01-02T04:14:27.551+08:00Hi Andrew, I am 自娱自乐,inspired by your beautiful re...Hi Andrew, I am 自娱自乐,inspired by your beautiful renditions, I give it a try for fun as well... <br /><br />《春 晓》- 孟浩然<br /> <br />春眠不觉晓,<br />处处闻啼鸟。<br />夜来风雨声,<br />花落知多少?<br /><br />A Spring Morning<br />by Meng Haoran<br />tr. ziyuzile <br /> <br />I slept through until the first light;<br />Hark, near and far spring birds hum air.<br />How many petals overnight<br />Did the tempest strike down out there?<br /><br /> <br />I slept through until the first light;<br />Hark, spring birds sing songs here and there.<br />How many flowers overnight<br />I wonder th' thunderstorm did spare.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-74919357378063669562012-05-12T07:53:45.290+08:002012-05-12T07:53:45.290+08:00I agree that "From far and near"
is bet...I agree that "From far and near" <br />is better than "From near then far"<br /><br />what about "From near and far"?<br /><br />i like your "near" and "fear" pairing. Perhaps that's why your choice of "far and near".<br /><br />well done!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-85190531427661938372011-03-20T04:56:29.781+08:002011-03-20T04:56:29.781+08:00I need one more revision to my line 3. This is fi...I need one more revision to my line 3. This is final, final:-<br /><br />1 In spring I sleep aware not morning is here,<br />2 From far and near, trilling songbirds I hear.<br />3 In the pitter patter of wind and rain last night,<br />4 How many blossoms fallen? Know not, I fear.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-74137035190762991912011-03-20T04:37:01.938+08:002011-03-20T04:37:01.938+08:00This I hope is my final revision:-
1 In spring I ...This I hope is my final revision:-<br /><br />1 In spring I sleep aware not morning is here;<br />2 From far and near, trilling songbirds I hear.<br />3 In the pitter patter of the night's wind and rain,<br />4 How many blossoms fallen? Know not, I fear.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-26972556197830697102011-03-19T14:04:38.191+08:002011-03-19T14:04:38.191+08:00I have decided to further revise it as follows:-
...I have decided to further revise it as follows:-<br /><br />Meng Haoran: A Morning in Spring<br /><br />1 In spring I sleep unaware that morning is here;<br />2 Then from far and near, trilling songbirds I hear.<br />3 In the pitter patter of the night's wind and rain,<br />4 How many flowers have fallen? Know not, I fear.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-66025726711141204502011-03-19T13:16:34.442+08:002011-03-19T13:16:34.442+08:00I have decided to revise my rendition as follows:-...I have decided to revise my rendition as follows:-<br /><br />Meng Haoran: A Morning in Spring<br /><br />1 In spring I sleep, unaware morning is here;<br />2 Then, far and near, trilling songbirds I hear.<br />3 In the pitter patter of wind and rain last night,<br />4 How many blossoms fallen? Not few, I fear!Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-13823730047068078162010-05-06T18:07:19.214+08:002010-05-06T18:07:19.214+08:00hi, andrew,
my 2 cents of thought below for your ...hi, andrew,<br /><br />my 2 cents of thought below for your consideration:<br /><br />1. re your 'In the din of the wind and rain throughout the night,' i do agree with lily kwan (hey, i know her in 'aodays') that 'in the din of' may be way too strong, rather uncalled for; it conjures up the scene of shakespeare's 3 witches ('when will we three meet again? in thunder, lightning and in rain!) yet, meng hoaran doesn't mention there was a storm; at least not quite.<br /><br />2. so, am more for the other one:<br />'In the night's pitter-pattering of winds and rains,' which i would have thought should read: 'In the night's pitter-pattering of rains, and winds,' (for you can't say<br />'pitter-pattering of winds...')Frank Yuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17939635563021036391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-27403803555067323412010-05-06T13:47:12.610+08:002010-05-06T13:47:12.610+08:00I have decided to revise my rendition as follows:
...I have decided to revise my rendition as follows:<br />*In spring I sleep unaware morning is here,<br />*Then from far and near, trilling songbirds I hear.<br />*In the din of the wind and rain throughout the night,<br />*How many blossoms fallen? Not few, I fear.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-63844720986954812042010-05-06T12:47:21.689+08:002010-05-06T12:47:21.689+08:00Dear Frank,
I am still working on a further revis...Dear Frank,<br /><br />I am still working on a further revision and a proper reply to your comments. Meanwhile, may I bring to your attention my previous revision attempts, one in my March 2008 post and one in my April 2008 post. I attach the April one here:<br /><br />Now, further back to my February 2008 post, I have now decided to revert to the onomatopoeiac word "pitter-patter" in line 3 of "A Morning in Spring" by Meng Haoran (689-740), thus:-<br /><br />*In spring I sleep unaware morning is here,<br />*From near then far, trilling songbirds I hear.<br />*In the night's pitter-pattering of winds and rains,<br />*How many blossoms fallen? Not few, I fear!<br /><br />Notes:-<br />* I am grateful to Lily Yam Kwan who urged me to reconsider "In the din of".<br />*Line 1: I have deleted the two commas in the line.<br /><br />Best wishes, Andrew Wong.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-34333223498622594092010-05-06T09:57:06.347+08:002010-05-06T09:57:06.347+08:00oh, andrew,
i beg to differ on this point (1). i ...oh, andrew,<br /><br />i beg to differ on this point (1). i stand by my interpretation on the following grounds:<br /><br />1. while you are sleeping, esp. quite soundly (based on line 1 春眠不觉晓), you won't hear a thing at all if only a "breeze" with no sound is blowing, and when only "drizzles" or even "light rain" are/is falling throughout the night. in these cases, the flowers won't be falling in great nos.<br /><br />2. now with line 3 夜来风雨声, i take this to mean "rather heavy or driving rain" plus occasional "strong gusts of wind blowing" that are clearly audible even when the poet is asleep at night, resulting in line 4 the lament: 花落知多少! in late morning.Frank Yuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17939635563021036391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-82497675751147116002010-05-04T16:37:12.727+08:002010-05-04T16:37:12.727+08:00Dear Frank, On (1), yes, your "howling"...Dear Frank, On (1), yes, your "howling" and "pounding". Best wishes, Andrew Wong.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-90123915018428876962010-05-04T06:00:34.198+08:002010-05-04T06:00:34.198+08:00thanks, andrew,
re (1) but nothing really added o...thanks, andrew,<br /><br />re (1) but nothing really added onto the original. <br />re (2) yes, you're right.Frank Yuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17939635563021036391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-41488191917970787312010-05-03T15:16:59.776+08:002010-05-03T15:16:59.776+08:00Dear Frank, I am considering revising my version ...Dear Frank, I am considering revising my version and cannot, therefore, afford the time to think further on your two version. Just wish to say:<br />(1) Your line 3 is too long.<br />(2) I think you mean "plight", not "blight" in line 4.<br />Best wishes, Andrew Wong.Andrew W.F. Wong 黃宏發https://www.blogger.com/profile/13042865467544530221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-17568089186660846002010-05-01T04:16:16.531+08:002010-05-01T04:16:16.531+08:00i've given this further thought and would like...i've given this further thought and would like to change the last line. the whole piece now appears as follows:<br /><br />One Spring Morning Meng Haoran (689-740)<br />Soundly sleeping, in Spring one morning still finds me;<br />From everywhere, all the birds are singing with glee.<br />Sounds of howling wind and pounding rain raged last night. <br />O how many flow'rs have fallen and met their blight?Frank Yuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17939635563021036391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3395481176873249475.post-12001426239750641252010-05-01T01:28:00.240+08:002010-05-01T01:28:00.240+08:00oops! just a typo. 'get' should read
'...oops! just a typo. 'get' should read<br />'set' -- you set the bar pretty hi.Frank Yuehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17939635563021036391noreply@blogger.com